6 Things To Know About Swinging, Millennials' Hottest Kept Secret

Updated: Aug 9

Imagine a world of complete transparency within relationships.

A transparency that translates to less infidelity, less confinement and fewer insecurities, but more trust, more fun and more freedom.

I'm talking about a world of open relationships. More specifically, I'm talking about swinging.

A couple years ago, ABC News did a special segment about Gen-Y couples who swing.

In an article, ABC News reported, "Forget the notion that swingers parties are full of middle-aged folks who are bored stiff by years of marriage."

And, given the number of young couples I've met in LA and Las Vegas who are into the lifestyle, it seems the trend for Gen-Y is getting bigger. They just don't talk about it.

To put it simply, swingers are couples, usually who are in committed relationships or are married, who swap partners.

But the world of swinging is much too vast to define in one sentence.

There isn't just one way for couples to swing. It all depends on a couple's mutual preference.

So what do swingers do exactly? How do they meet? Below is an overview for everything you need to know about swinging:

How Swingers Meet

Lifestyle Clubs

If you're thinking of going out to a regular bar or club in hopes of meeting another couple that down to swing, your chances are low.

The good news is there are so many resources for swingers.

Swingers clubs are usually labeled as "lifestyle clubs." A simple Google search for "(your city) lifestyle club" or "(your city) swingers clubs" might just do the trick.

Bocanegra Club is a new type of lifestyle club focused on high end Masquerade parties.

Most clubs will charge you a membership fee. That membership can last three months to a lifetime, depending on the club.

When you attend an event, you'll be asked for a "donation."

Bocanegra Club doesn't charge for membership fees but we do sell tickets for each event.


If you're not ready to go to a club just yet or if you want a more efficient way to explore your options, you may want to join a social network for swingers.

The two most popular sites are and

These work very much like dating sites. You and your partner can browse photos of other couples and send messages.

The two sites I listed above also show you events happening near your city.

What Swingers Do

Full Swap

When you and your partner are down for a full swap, it basically means both of you are open to share each other with another couple.

However, most couples do have conditions.

Couples can decide if they only want to do a full swap in the same room (which is usually recommend by experienced swingers) or to be completely open, meaning anything goes, anywhere.

Whenever you meet another couple in the lifestyle, it's common to disclose what you're looking for as a couple to see if there's a mutual interest. One of the first questions couples ask each other is what they're down for. Full swap is one of those options.